Losing Someone Important

Say you’ve known someone your whole life. They’ve met all of your family members and been at every single birthday get together you have ever had.

They know all of your secrets and all of your fears. Yet you don’t know much about them.

Yes, you have known each other for as long as you can remember, you don’t remember the last time you had a meaningful conversation with them. When was the last time you spent time alone with them and actually enjoyed it?

Maybe you are growing apart. Maybe it’s time to come to terms with the fact that you no longer know who they are. You have spent too much time focusing on university, work and romantic relationships that you have forgotten to be there for them.

They are going through a hard time and they need you to listen. They need you to stop focusing on other aspects of life and listen to them. The are too ashamed to ask for your help, they don’t want to come off as selfish or needy. So they keep quiet. They let you keep yourself busy and distracted while they slowly start to disappear. Fade away until one day, when you need them most, they have gone, long forgotten.

That is when you realise that you didn’t make enough time for them. You didn’t listen to them when they cried out for help. You didn’t hear them. You didn’t hear you. You didn’t listen to your inner voice and now you have lost who you are.

Take time out for yourself. Get to know yourself again. Fall in love with who you are. Treat yourself and be happy. You can’t expect anyone else to.

I am slowly coming to terms with the idea of loving me. Not waiting for anyone to buy me flowers, but buying them myself. Doing things that I want to do without asking for other peoples approval. At the end of the day the only person that I am certain will be around in my life is me, so why not treat myself? Why not spend time getting to know myself? Try it. Take yourself out for dinner. Go to the movies alone. Get comfortable with your own company.

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Crusty Foot! (PediSpin Review)

So since last week I had NEVER had a pedicure! Heck, I didn’t even think about getting one until Jay from Curlture gave me the most disgusted look when I told her that my feet were pure πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

You know what, there was one specific moment in my life that made me realise that my feet were worse than I had thought. Don’t get me wrong, I did know that my feet were pretty crusty but one day I was given a shock of my life!

I was wearing a pair of shorts at home with no socks on whilst sitting at my desk. With my right leg folded underneath my bum I started to feel something sharp poking my thigh. I checked what was digging into my skin and I couldn’t see anything. So I continued to sit on my leg. It happened again! I couldn’t find the culprit at all! Then I decided to slowly sit back down whilst watching my thigh to see what was causing discomfort. Then I saw it πŸ™ˆ A part of my hard crusty heel was poking out. Digging my thigh. That’s when I knew that my feet needed some serious attention.

Then randomly I came across Vanity Planet, I ordered the PediSpin and as soon as it arrived I was too excited to use it.

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The box came with a user manual, the PediSpin, a Hard Bristle Brush to remove dirt particles, a Pumice Stone to eradicate dry skin and stains, a Callus Shaver to get rid of thick calluses and a Buffing Pad to refine and buff the soles of your feet. I used the attachments in that order. The first two can be used in the shower but the other two are to be used on dry feet.

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Now, I tested this out straight away and when I used the first attachment (Hard Bristle Brush) I was less than impressed. The brush didn’t feel like it was doing anything to my feet just lightly brushing it. It wasn’t until I came to use the Callus Shaver that I fell in love with the PediSpin.

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This thing took my hard, dry and crusty feet to a place they have not been to in a very long time! Just for the sake of this blog post and because my feet no longer look crusty, I will insert a before and after photo below.

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I just had to come on here and tell you guys about it! Especially as it getting warmer and the sandals are coming out. Oh, before I forget, I have a 70% discount for you guys to use on ANY of the Vanity Planet products. Just use this link ! You have until June 4th 2016 xxx

Why I prefer being Unemployed

As some of you may know, I work in a school. A rather new school at that.Β  It wasn’t like I have always wanted to work in a school, in fact I don’t. I remember back in February of my final year at university. I was sitting there thinking that I need some kind of experience before I graduate. I had worked for two weeks at Wimbledon the summer before as security/steward (lol). I had also done a couple of freelance running jobs in the post production section of Channel 4. That was more of what I wanted to do. Not being a runner, but being a film editor. I love to edit, and I love to film so I was in love with the idea of working at Channel 4 (notice how I didn’t say I was in love with working there). But because it was freelance, I barely worked. So I decided to check out what my old media teacher was doing. I found out he was working as a Vice Principle at a Media College, so I contacted him regarding a bit of work experience at his school.

True to his nature, he didn’t reply until about 3 months later. He messaged me saying that there was a job offering at the school if I was interested. And of course I was. I visited the school on a bright summers day and it just reminded me of Los Angeles. The way the building looked and it’s location just amazed me (my views have changed drastically since then).

Anyways, I wasn’t completely sure whether I would get the job there so I spent my free time back home figuring out what I could do to make money. That was the best time of my life. Having no source of income made me actually sit down and think about what I am good at doing. I have never been so creative in my life. I wrote down a whole list of things I could do; faux locs, canerows, yarn braids, editing, filming etc etc. I had the mentality of a hustler. I had so many means of making money listed down.

Once I got the job my mind set changed. I waited for the end of the month to get my money, and I was content. It wasn’t until exam period at the school where I really started to reevaluate my life. I was made to sit and invigilate numerous exams. It was the worst month ever! Sitting there, in silence for hours on end, with the worst year 11s group I have ever met (well they weren’t too bad). I sat there hating where I had ended up. This wasn’t my life calling. I was not created to work for someone else, doing something I hated. And that’s when I decided that I was going to quit my job and get back to that hustler mentality. I wanted to leave at the end of that academic year, but that wasn’t smart. I didn’t have enough money to live off of. So I made a promise to my self that I would spend the next year saving almost half of my monthly wages and getting my skills up to scratch, so that I was all set for July 21st 2016.

I have been counting down ever since. I have spent my money on things that will, and already have, been making me money. I have started up Mother N Diaspora, an African Inspired art collection that focuses on Africa and all of her children. I am still trying to figure out how to get my pieces printed nicely enough to sell on t-shirts, phone cases, canvases etc.

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Β jonelle monae WEB copy Malcolm printing LATEST

I will be my own boss.

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My Goodness, I’ve been away for a while! To think, one of my last blog posts was of my 2nd Big Chop and now my hair is less than an inch long. YES! I cut it all off! πŸ˜€

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There has been a few changes in my life over the past 2 months. Firstly like I mentioned, I completely cut off my hair. I woke up one morning and was fed up with the fact that my wash and go from the day before was no longer existent. I got my dads clippers and cut it all to a level 2. Of course I recorded myself doing it. You can see how my dad gave me a helping hand too.

The reactions have been quite interesting to say the least. A lot of the elders have given me “the look” when I tell them I cut if off because I just wanted to. They clearly don’t approve, but I couldn’t care less. As long as I am happy with it then I am content. The best reaction I received was from my Grandma who is currently living back home in Tanzania.

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I have received messages from distant relatives basically making sure that I wasn’t going crazy. That’s what a lot of people think for some reason, if you have spent a few years looking after your hair properly and you cut it all off then there definitely must be something wrong with you! This has made me realise how materialistic hair really is. People put way too much importance into a appearance. I have come to the point in my life where I would rather people respect me for the things that I say and do rather than the way I look. Yes, hair for a black person is important. I have already made my statement and have helped people with their own natural hair.

I love the way I look. I love my natural hair.

Now it is time to focus on the inside. I know I have a great mind, I just to exercise it more. I need to be able to articulate what is on my mind. Not just speak it, but also express it.

Not many people know that I have loved to draw my whole life. In the past few months I have decided to take it seriously. I have created Mother N Diaspora, a brand that focuses on art inspired by the Motherland and her Children. I will do another blog post on this soon.

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Until next time πŸ™‚